Part 4 of 4 in the mini series “5 Ways a Doula Can Help” | Observing Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month

Let’s break the taboo and talk about pregnancy loss…

Experiencing a pregnancy loss can be an emotionally challenging and isolating journey for many families. Coping with grief, uncertainty, and a range of complex emotions can be overwhelming, especially when it is something that is still seen as “taboo” to speak about. While doulas are often associated with providing support during labor and birth, their role extends beyond this. Doulas, specifically bereavement doulas, can be a valuable source of support and comfort during pregnancy loss as well.

The month of October: Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, observed every October, is a dedicated time for raising awareness, providing support, and reducing the stigma surrounding the heart-wrenching experiences of losing a pregnancy or an infant. This includes miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, ectopic pregnancy, termination for medical reasons, and the death of a newborn. This month aims to honor and remember the babies who are no longer with us, offer solace and solidarity to grieving families, and promote open discussions about these losses to ensure that affected individuals receive the understanding and care they need during such a challenging time. In this blog post, we'll explore five ways a doula can help you through the difficult process of pregnancy loss.

Let’s discuss: A doula’s role during pregnancy loss

1. EMOTIONAL SUPPORT

   One of the primary roles of a doula is to offer emotional support. When facing a pregnancy loss, emotions can be intense and vary greatly. A doula is there to provide a listening ear, validate your feelings, and allow you a safe space to express your grief, anger, or sadness. Doulas offer compassionate understanding and can help you navigate the emotional rollercoaster that comes with pregnancy loss.

2. EDUCATION & GUIDANCE

   Doulas are knowledgeable about the various aspects of pregnancy and childbirth. They can provide you with valuable information about the physical and emotional aspects of pregnancy loss, including what to expect during the process, and explain available options, and post-loss care. This information can empower you to make informed decisions and alleviate some of the uncertainty that can accompany pregnancy loss. Knowing what is to come can ease the worry of the unknown. Many people do not know what to expect and unfortunately go through it alone.

3. BIRTH PLANNING

   In some cases of pregnancy loss, medical intervention may be necessary to manage the physical aspects of the loss. A doula can assist you in creating a birth plan, should it be required. They can help you discuss your preferences with medical professionals and ensure that your emotional and physical well-being are at the forefront of the care you receive. Doulas can present you with different options you may not have known were available to you. You will have different options depending on how far along you are in your pregnancy.

4. COPING TECHNIQUES

   Coping with pregnancy loss is a unique and individual experience. Doulas can introduce you to various coping techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, and other relaxation exercises to help manage the stress and anxiety that often accompanies such loss. These tools can be instrumental in providing a sense of control during an otherwise uncontrollable situation. Doulas can also connect you with support groups and make other referrals in your community. Support during and after a loss can make a huge difference for many parents.

5. POST-LOSS SUPPORT

   The journey of healing after a pregnancy loss is ongoing, and doulas can continue to provide support during this time. They can connect you with resources, support groups, and therapists who specialize in pregnancy loss. A doula can provide support to partners as well, helping them cope with their emotions and also giving them tools for helping you. Postpartum support is something that bereaved parents can benefit from as well. Helping with tasks around the house, caring for your postpartum body, and making meals that help you heal are just some of the ways a postpartum doula can help you.

Remember, you are not alone! 

Pregnancy loss can be a devastating experience, and no one should have to go through it alone. Doulas, with their expertise in emotional support, knowledge of pregnancy and childbirth, and a strong commitment to their clients, can be invaluable companions during this difficult journey. By offering emotional support, providing information and guidance, assisting with birth plans, teaching coping techniques, and offering post-loss support, doulas can help individuals and families navigate the challenges of pregnancy loss with compassion and care. If you are experiencing a loss, know that help does exist and you have every right to seek it out.